Parenting isn’t just a full-time job, it’s also often a comedy special you didn’t sign up for. From grocery store tantrums to kids with snappy comebacks, these hilarious moments prove kids and their parents are the ultimate jokesters!
The Case of the Missing Ladle
John, a well-to-do bachelor, invited his mother over for dinner one night. During the meal, the mum couldn’t help but notice how attractive her son’s housekeeper was and wondered if there was more going on than meets the eye.
A housekeeper | Source: Pexels
John sensing what his mother was thinking said to her: “I know what you’re thinking, mum, but I assure you my relationship with the housekeeper is purely professional.”
A week later, the housekeeper told John that ever since his mother’s visit a silver gravy ladle has been missing. John sent his mother a note that said: “Mom, I’m not saying you did take the gravy ladle, and I’m not saying you didn’t, but the fact remains one has been missing since you were here.”
A gravy ladle | Source: Midjourney
A few days later he receives a note from his mother. “I’m not saying you’re involved with your housekeeper, and I’m not saying you’re not. But if she were sleeping in her own bed, she would’ve found the ladle by now.”
Mom’s Final Resting Place
A 97-year-old woman sits down with her attorney to discuss her last wishes.
An attorney in his office | Source: Pexels
“I have two requests before I die,” she begins. “First, I want to be cremated.”
The attorney nods respectfully. “Of course, I can arrange that.”
The woman continues, “And second, I’d like my ashes to be scattered over the roof of the Walmart down the road.”
A convenience store | Source: Pexels
The attorney blinks in surprise. “Walmart? Why Walmart?”
The old woman chuckles. “Because that way, I know my daughters will come to see me at least twice a week!”
The Birds, the Bees, and the Backfire
A mom calls her young daughter into the kitchen for “The Talk.”
A mother cooking with her daughter | Source: Pexels
Clearing her throat, she says, “Sweetie, I think it’s time we discussed… you know… sex.”
The daughter smirks and replies, “Alright, Mom! So, what have you heard so far?”
The Whisper Lesson
One evening, a little boy runs into the living room full of guests and shouts, “MOM! I GOTTA PEE!”
A boy shouting | Source: Pexels
Embarrassed, his mom pulls him aside and says, “Sweetie, we don’t say that. Instead, just say you need to whisper if you have to go to the bathroom.”
The next night, he tries it out. “Mom, I need to whisper,” he says quietly, and she takes him to the bathroom, proud of his new manners.
Later, he finds his dad watching TV and says, “Dad, I need to whisper.”
A boy talking to his father | Source: Midjourney
Without looking away from the screen, his dad grins and says, “Alright, buddy — whisper in my ear.”
Secrets Unlocked
A little girl sits in the backseat as her mom drives her to a playdate. Out of the blue, the girl asks, “Mommy, how old are you?”
Her mom sighs and says, “Sweetie, that’s not a polite question to ask someone.”
A serious woman driving | Source: Pexels
The girl thinks for a moment and then asks, “Okay, how much do you weigh?”
Annoyed, the mom responds, “That’s none of your business.”
Not giving up, the little girl asks, “Well, why did you and Daddy get a divorce?”
The mom, now clearly frustrated, snaps, “That’s enough! Stop asking so many personal questions!”
An angry woman driving | Source: Midjourney
Later that day, the little girl is telling her friend about the conversation. Her friend then tells her, “Just go and look at her driving license! It’s like a report card.”
The next day, the girl proudly announces to her mother, “I figured out everything about you, Mommy! I looked at your driver’s license. You’re 35, weigh 145 pounds, and you and Daddy got a divorce because you got an ‘F’ in sex!”
A smiling little girl | Source: Pexels
God Will Provide… Apparently
A young woman brings her fiancé home to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother suggests that her father get to know the young man better, so the father invites him to his study for a drink.
The father begins, “So, what are your plans for the future?”
A family dinner | Source: Pexels
The fiancé replies confidently, “I’m a scholar, sir.”
The father nods, then asks, “That’s admirable, but how will you provide a nice home for my daughter?”
The fiancé smiles. “I will study hard, sir, and God will provide.”
“And what about a beautiful engagement ring?” the father presses.
An engagement ring | Source: Pexels
“I will focus on my studies, and God will provide,” the fiancé repeats.
The father narrows his eyes. “And children? How will you support them?”
“Don’t worry, sir. God will provide.”
Later, the mother asks her husband how the conversation went.
A mature couple talking | Source: Pexels
He sighs and says, “The boy has no job, no plans, and worst of all, he thinks I’m God.”
Missy’s Grocery Store Adventure
A man notices a woman with a three-year-old in her shopping cart.
In the cookie aisle, the little girl screams for cookies. The mom calmly says, “Now, Missy, we’re almost done. Don’t make a fuss.”
A woman with a child in a store | Source: Pexels
In the candy section, the girl starts whining. The mom replies gently, “There, there, Missy. Just two more aisles, and we’ll be checking out.”
At the checkout line, the girl howls for gum. The mom reassures, “Missy, we’ll be home soon for a bottle and a nap.”
Impressed by her patience, the man compliments her in the parking lot. “I admire how calm you stayed with little Missy,” he says.
A man talking to a woman in a store | Source: Midjourney
The woman smiles tiredly. “Oh, no, my daughter’s name is Francine. I’m Missy.”
Family Secrets Unveiled
A son excitedly tells his dad, “Dad, I’m getting married!”
The dad smiles. “That’s great news! Who’s the lucky girl?”
“It’s Sally, the girl next door!” the son replies.
A happy smiling man | Source: Pexels
The dad’s face falls. “Son, I need to tell you something. Years ago, I made a mistake… Sally is your sister.”
Shocked, the son says, “Okay, then I’ll marry Katie, my old high school friend.”
The dad shakes his head. “I’m sorry, son, but Katie is also your sister.”
A smiling mature man | Source: Pexels
Frustrated, the son storms into the kitchen, where his mom is sitting. Having overheard the commotion, she looks up and says, “Marry whoever you want, dear! He’s not your real father anyway!”
Mom Always Knows
A young man says to his mom, “Mom, tonight I’m bringing over three girls. One of them is the one I want to marry. Let’s see if you can figure out which one it is.”
A man talking on his phone | Source: Pexels
That evening, the three girls come over for dinner. After they leave, the son asks, “So, Mom, which one do you think it is?”
Without hesitation, she replies, “It’s the one who sat in the middle.”
Amazed, he asks, “Wow, you’re right! How did you know?”
An excited smiling man | Source: Pexels
She smirks and says, “Because she’s already annoying me.”
Counting Lessons
A kid comes home from school with a black eye. His mom gasps and says, “Didn’t I tell you to be smart and count to a hundred before getting into a fight?”
The kid sighs and replies, “I did, Mom! But while I was counting to a hundred like you said, Billy punched me in the face. His parents only told him to count to fifty!”
A smiling small boy | Source: Pexels
Pantry Predicament
Mom says, “Tom, this morning I left two pieces of cake in the pantry, and now there’s only one. Can you explain that?”
Tom replies, “Well, Mom, it was really dark in there… I didn’t see the second piece!”
A chocolate cake | Source: Pexels
Parenting Logic
My 8-year-old was fighting with her sisters, so I asked, “All right, who started it?”
Without missing a beat, she replied, “You did — when you decided to have so many kids.”
An angry young girl | Source: Pexels
If you liked this, here’s some more jokes to tickle you blue:
7 Jokes with the Most Unexpected Plot Twists
Laughter is the best way to brighten your day, and we’ve got seven hilarious jokes that are sure to do just that! From marriage counseling gone wrong to jaw-dropping family secrets, these stories will have you laughing out loud. Get ready for a fun ride full of surprises!
Who doesn’t love a good laugh? Whether you’ve had a rough day or just need a little pick-me-up, we’ve got you covered.
A group of friends laughing | Source: Pexels
These jokes are guaranteed to brighten your mood. From husbands with some wild misunderstandings to surprising family twists, there’s something here for everyone.
Ready? Let’s dive into the fun!
Marriage Counseling with a Twist
After 30 years of marriage, a husband and wife sit in front of a therapist. The wife starts in on a long list of grievances: “He doesn’t listen to me, he’s distant, we haven’t been close in ages. I feel neglected, lonely, unloved…”
A couple in therapy | Source: Pexels
She keeps going and going, pouring out years of frustration. Finally, the therapist stands up, walks around his desk, and approaches the wife.
He asks her to stand and proceeds to lean in and give her a long, passionate kiss. The husband looks on in surprise, and the wife? She’s left completely speechless by the intensity of their therapist’s kiss.
A shocked woman | Source: Pexels
The therapist turns to the husband and says, “Your wife needs this at least three times a week if you’re serious about saving your marriage. Can you manage that?”
Wanna read the rest of the joke?
Young Woman Gets a Job as a Maid and Notices Mother’s Framed Photo in Boss’s Bedroom – Story of the Day
Caroline got a job as a cleaning lady in New York and went to her first assignment. It was a beautiful house in Manhattan, but something shocked her. There was a picture of her mother in the office. Then a man walked in.
“I’m going to do a great job,” Caroline psyched herself up in front of her first assignment. She and her friend, Melissa, moved to New York a few days ago to make their dreams of being Broadway stars come true.
But they needed to find jobs first to rent an apartment together. Luckily, Melissa got hired at a clothing store, and Caroline got a job at an agency for domestic cleaners.
It was perfect. It wasn’t that time-consuming, and she loved cleaning because it had a calming effect on her. Moreover, if no one else was home, she could practice her singing voice.
Caroline was going to her first assignment as a cleaning lady. | Source: Shutterstock
Unfortunately, her mother’s face popped into her mind before walking into her first home. Her mother, Helen, didn’t want her to chase after such silly dreams, much less live in New York.
Caroline was born and raised in Philadelphia, which wasn’t that far away. She didn’t have a father, and her mother never said a word about him. For some reason, Helen really hated New York. She also sheltered Caroline all her life, which was why she had to escape.
When she and Melissa planned their move, she knew her mother would not allow it. Caroline suspected she may even fake an illness just to get her to stay. But Caroline needed to fight for her dreams. It was her life. So, she left a tiny note on her mother’s dresser when she was asleep and ran away.
It had been several days, and Helen had not called her, which was weird. But Caroline assumed she was probably mad at her. Hopefully, she would get over it once Caroline debuted on Broadway. Now, it was time to focus on cleaning this house.
According to the agency director, an older man lives in the house alone, so it was not particularly messy in the first place. When Caroline finally walked inside using the key under the mat as was instructed, she wasted no time to start cleaning — first, the kitchen, then the living room, and moving towards the bedroom.
She noticed the pictures above the mantelpiece. | Source: Unplash
“I’m almost done, sir. But may I ask a question? Who is this woman?”
She hesitated a bit right at the entrance of a serious-looking office, but there were no instructions against coming in. She resolved not to touch too much around the desk and continued cleaning.
There was a beautiful fireplace with a mantelpiece on top and huge bookshelves along the opposite wall. It was the kind of office Caroline had only seen in movies.
She tidied as quickly and thoroughly as she could but stopped short at the mantelpiece. There were several pictures on top, but one caught her attention. A picture with her mother’s face. She was at least 18 years younger, but it was her. “Why is my mother in this man’s pictures?” she wondered out loud.
Suddenly, she heard footsteps and an older man entered the office. “Oh hello there! You must be the new cleaning lady. I’m Richard Smith. I own this house,” the man introduced himself with a warm smile. “Are you done in here already?”
“I’m almost done, sir. But may I ask a question?” Caroline hesitated, hoping that the man wouldn’t be mad if she asked about the image. “Who is this woman?”
The man moved closer to see what picture she was talking about. | Source: Pexels
“Who?” he wondered, moving closer to her and putting on his glasses. “Ah yes. That’s Helen. She was the love of my life.”
Caroline’s senses started pinging. “What happened to her?” She couldn’t help but ask.
“She died during a bus crash. She was pregnant at the time too. I couldn’t even go to the funeral because her mother hated me. It was crazy… I tried to move on and never did. To this day, I still love and miss her,” Richard responded, removing his glasses and moving towards his chair.
“Sir, I’m sorry to intrude like this, and thank you for telling me. But this woman… she looks so much like my mother. It’s insane,” Caroline revealed.
The older man frowned at her. “What do you mean?”
“Well, my mother, Helen, looks exactly like this woman. Obviously, she’s older now, but the resemblance is uncanny. I’m 98% sure this is her,” she continued, facing Richard but gesturing toward the photograph.
Richard dialed right there from his desk. | Source: Pexels
“Helen? Your mother’s name is Helen? Where did you grow up?”
“Philadelphia,” she answered, shrugging her shoulders. Her eyes widened now that she realized that if that was Helen, then this man might be her father.
Richard covered his mouth with his hands. “This is not possible…” he whispered. “Can I have your mother’s phone number?”
“Sure,” she said and gave it to him.
“Can you stay here while I call her?” he requested, and Caroline agreed.
He dialed right there from his office phone, and her mother’s voice answered after a few rings. “Hello? Is it you, Caroline?”
Richard looked up at Caroline for a second but decided to speak up first. “Is this Helen Geller?”
“Yes. Who am I speaking to?” Helen asked from the other end of the line.
He told her about the alleged bus crash. | Source: Pexels
“Helen, it’s Richard,” he continued, his voice starting to get emotional.
“Richard, who? Wait a minute. Richard Morris? What do you want after all these years?” Helen asked, her voice hardening for some reason.
Caroline and Richard started at each other in confusion, but he continued. “What do you mean after all these years? I thought you were dead!”
“What?”
Richard explained what he knew of the alleged accident when he had lost his future wife and unborn baby. He also explained how Helen’s mother didn’t allow him at the funeral and refused to tell him anything afterward. But Helen had no idea what he was talking about and told him what she knew.
“My mother told me that you called and decided you wanted nothing to do with me. So I raised my daughter on my own,” Helen revealed, and Caroline was shocked by this turn of events.
Caroline wanted to make it on Broadway first. | Source: Pexels
“That’s not… Helen, I would never abandon you. I never moved on. I still thought of you every day. I mourned you. I’ve been in pain thinking about you and our kid for almost two decades,” Richard continued, but Helen was quiet.
“I can’t believe Mom would do this. But well, that was her way. I don’t know what do now,” Helen finally stated. “Wait. How did you find out I was still alive?”
“Mom, I’m here,” Caroline chimed in at last. She hurriedly explained what happened and reassured her mother that she was fine in New York.
“I can’t believe this is happening at all. I can’t even ask my mother why she would do something so cruel to us. She died years ago. But anyway, when are you coming back home, Caroline?” Helen asked, in a firmer voice toward her daughter.
“I’m not coming back until I make it on Broadway. And now, well… now I have another reason to stay here,” Caroline continued, looking at Richard with a tiny smile.
They broke the ice with one silly statement. | Source: Pexels
“Fine, but I’m coming up to New York soon,” Helen said and hung up. Richard and Caroline started at each other in silence for a few moments before either of them spoke up.
“So, I guess you’re my dad,” she chirped. He laughed, and that’s how they broke the ice.
What can we learn from this story?
- Let your children pursue their dreams. Caroline ran away because her mother was overprotective. You should guide your children but let them decide what to do with their lives.
- Some parents don’t have your best interests at heart. Helen’s mother did something horrible to her and Richard, and they would never know why.
Share this story with your friends. It might brighten their day and inspire them.
If you enjoyed this story, you might like this one about a woman who didn’t end the call with her husband, and he heard her conversation.
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