Sonia Todd of Moscow, Idaho, died of cancer at the young age of 38. But knowing the end was near, she decided to write her own obituary before passing away. As she explained, obituaries were usually written a couple of different ways that she simply didn’t care for. So, as one of her last acts on this earth, she put pen to paper and decided for herself how her obituary would read.
The result of Sonia confronting her own mortality as she penned her obituary was a piece full of humor as well as wisdom, appearing in the Moscow-Pullman Daily News. The words were so honest and inspirational that long after her death, they will still ring true, giving others something to aspire to. Ironically, Sonia wrote, “I never really accomplished anything of note.” How wrong she was. The truth expressed in the obituary she wrote proved to be quite an accomplishment in and of itself.
“Other than giving birth to my two wonderful, lovable, witty and amazing sons (James and Jason), marrying my gracious, understanding and precious husband (Brian), and accepting the Lord Jesus Christ as my personal savior – I have done very little. None of which requires obit space that I have to shell out money for,” Sonia Todd began, explaining why she was writing her obituary and why it wouldn’t be like others.
Adding that she didn’t want a bunch of her loved ones sitting around to write a glowing report of her, which she says would be “filled with fish tales, half-truths, impossible scenarios, and out-right-honest-to-goodness-lies,” Sonia explained she simply didn’t like putting people in those kinds of situations. With the explanation out of the way, she got to her version of the truth about her own life.
“I just tried to do the best I could. Sometimes I succeeded, most of the time I failed, but I tried. For all of my crazy comments, jokes and complaints, I really did love people. The only thing that separates me from anyone else is the type of sin each of us participated in. I didn’t always do the right thing or say the right thing and when you come to the end of your life those are the things you really regret, the small simple things that hurt other people,” Sonia admitted.
Although she said that she mostly enjoyed life, she also said it wasn’t perfect and that she encountered many bumps in the road, especially in her teens and early 20s. Even though some parts of her life were harder than others, Sonia said, “I learned something from every bad situation and I couldn’t do any more than that.” She also claimed there were benefits to dying young. Jokingly, she wrote, “I still owe on my student loans and the jokes on them cuz I’m not paying them. Plus, I am no longer afraid of serial killers, telemarketers or the IRS.”Addressing the fact that some people have told her that writing her own obituary is morbid, Sonia Todd continued, “I think it is great because I get a chance to say thank you to all the people who helped me along the way. Those who loved me, assisted me, cared for me, laughed with me and taught me things so that I could have a wonderful, happy life. I was blessed beyond measure by knowing all of you. That is what made my life worthwhile.”
It was the conclusion of her obituary that was the most important, however. Sonia encouraged others to change their lives. “If you think of me, and would like to do something in honor of my memory do this: Volunteer at a school, church or library. Write a letter to someone and tell them how they have had a positive effect on your life. If you smoke – quit. If you drink and drive – stop,” she wrote.
Her advise continued, “Turn off the electronics and take a kid out for ice cream and talk to them about their hopes and dreams. Forgive someone who doesn’t deserve it. Stop at all lemonade-stands run by kids and brag about their product. Make someone smile today if it is in your power to do so.”
Today seems like a good day to honor Sonia’s memory by completing some of these simple requests and reminding others to do the same. Luckily for us, we still have time for these things. And, thankfully, with her dying wish, Sonia Todd left us these words of wisdom that few realize until it’s too late
100 Year olds give secret to long marriage
Joe and Ann met in 1964Joe was a young soldier on leave, and Ann was a nurse at the local hospital, working tirelessly to tend to the men who came home battered and bruised. One afternoon, they happened to sit next to each other on a rickety bench in a small park by the hospital. Joe, looking down at his boots, noticed a young woman with kind eyes and a quiet smile reading a book beside him. They struck up a conversation about the book, and Joe felt like he’d been swept away to another world, far from the war and all its chaos.
The very next day, Joe had to leave for deployment again, but before he did, they arranged to meet on that same bench, no matter where life took them. Miraculously, they both survived the war, and when Joe returned, he found Ann waiting for him on that bench, a familiar sparkle in her eyes. They shared a lifetime together, raising a family, building a home, and creating a love that would endure the tests of time.
When they retired at age 55, they made it their tradition to return to that very park every single day, to sit together on their bench. Rain or shine, they’d be there, side by side, sharing stories, laughing, or just holding hands in comfortable silence. As the years went on, people in the town started calling it “Joe and Ann’s Bench.” Young couples would stop and smile at the sight of them, seeing the kind of love they hoped to grow into one day.
Their lives were filled with seasons of change—new grandkids, old friends passing, aches and pains that came with age—but that bench stayed the same. To them, it was more than a spot in the park; it was a witness to their love story, to all the memories they’d shared there.
Now, at 100 years old, they still meet at that bench every day. Joe helps Ann with her coat, and Ann straightens Joe’s hat before they sit. They often laugh about how old they’ve gotten, and every once in a while, Ann will lean her head on Joe’s shoulder like she did in the early days. Sometimes they’re silent for long stretches, but in that silence, they feel the weight of the love they’ve built together, rich with a thousand unspoken words.
When people ask them the secret to staying in love for so long, Joe always winks and says, “Just find someone you want to sit with, forever.” Ann always smiles at him when he says this, knowing he still means it with his whole heart.
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