A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner. This is tobe her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating a fine meal.
The woman is beginning to feel a little discomfort, thanks to her nervousness and the broccoli casserole. The gas pains are almost making her eyes water. Left with no other choice, she decides to relieve herself a bit and lets out a dainty fart.
It wasn’t loud, but everyone at the table heard thepouf. Before she even had a chanceto be embarrassed, her boyfriend’s father looked over at the dog that had been snoozing at the woman’s feet and said in a rather stern voice, “Skippy!”. The woman thought, “This is great!” and a big smile came across her face. A couple of minutes later, she was beginning to feel the pain again.
This time, she didn’t even hesitate. She let a much louder and longer fart rip. The father again looked and the dog and yelled, “Dammit Skippy!” Once again the woman smiled and thought “Yes!”. A few minutes laterthe woman had to let another one rip.
This time she didn’t even think about it. She let rip a fart that rivaled a train whistle blowing! Once again, the father looked at the dog with disgust and yelled, ”Dammit Skippy, get away from her before she shits on you!”
These Target stores are set to close: Here’s the full list
Target, grappling with escalating theft and “organized retail crime,” is set to close nine outlets across four states. Despite “adding more security team members, using third-party guard services, and implementing theft-deterrent tools,” the challenges with crime persisted. Below are the affected markets along with the remaining stores and employment data:
New York City: Harlem: 517 E 117th St. (96 remaining stores, over 20,000 team members) Seattle: University Way: 4535 University Way NE Ballard: 1448 NW Market St., Ste. 100 (22 remaining stores, nearly 4,000 team members) San Francisco/Oakland: SF Folsom: 1690 Folsom St. Oakland Broadway: 2650 Broadway Pittsburg: 4301 Century Blvd. (32 remaining stores, over 6,400 team members) Portland: Galleria: 939 SW Morrison St. Powell: 3031 SE Powell Blvd. Hollywood: 4030 NE Halsey St. (15 remaining stores, more than 2,500 team members) Over 150 stores remain operational in these regions. Target is boosting security through locking cases for certain merchandise and allying with the U.S. Department of Homeland Security’s Homeland Security Investigations division. “While we will continue to make meaningful investments throughout our business, we cannot solve this issue on our own,” the firm noted.
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