A 17–year–old boy working a part–time job at Pizza Hut shocked his parents when he drove up to their house in a glossy Porsche. Their eyes wide with surprise, they immediately grilled him.
“Where did this car come from?” they inquired, voice tinged with astonishment.
“I picked it up today,” responded the boy, unfazed.
His mother, increasingly anxious, pressed on, “How on earth did you manage to buy a Porsche? We know the hefty price tag on those, and your job certainly doesn’t cover it!”
Coolly, the boy detailed, “It’s second-hand, and the deal was too good to pass up. It cost me just 20 dollars.”
Aghast, his mother asked, “Who would sell a Porsche for just 20 dollars?”
“A woman a few doors down,” he explained. “She’s a recent arrival to our street. When I delivered her pizza, she offered to sell me the Porsche for 20 dollars.”
Perplexed and concerned, his parents made their way to the woman’s house, seeking clarity. They found her serenely gardening.
The father, attempting to stay calm, stated, “We are the parents of the young man you sold a Porsche to for 20 dollars. We’re here to find out why.”
The woman paused her gardening, looked them in the eye, and explained, “This morning, my husband phoned me. I assumed he was in Florida for business, but actually, he has eloped to Hawaii with his secretary and plans to stay there.”
Bewildered, the boy’s mother queried, “What does that have to do with selling a Porsche for 20 dollars?”
The woman, cracking a wry smile, responded, “He asked me to sell his Porsche and send him the proceeds. So, I simply did as he requested.”
Sо I аm аt Wаlmаrt sсаnning аnd bаgging my аlmоst $300
So I am at Walmart scanning and bagging my almost $300 worth of groceries while the employee that wants $15 an hour “monitors” and then this happened.
Her – why are you double bagging all of your groceries?
Me – excuse me?
Her – you are wasting our bags!
Me – if you don’t likе the way I’m bagging the groceries, feel free to come on over here and bag them yourself.
Her – that’s not my job!
Me – okay, then I will bag my groceries how I please if that’s all right with you.
Her – why are you using two bags?!
Me – because the bags are weak and I don’t want the handles to break or the bottoms to rip out.
Her – well that’s because you are putting too much stuff in the bag. If you took half of that stuff out and put it in a different bag then you wouldn’t need to double bag.
*10 seconds of me just staring at her.
Me – so you want me to split these items in half and put half of them in a different bag so that I don’t have to double bag.
Her – exactly.
Me – so I would still be using two bags to hold the same number of items.
Her – no because you wouldn’t be double bagging.
*me pressing two fingers to my left eye in an attempt to make it stop twitching.
Me – okay so here I have a jug of milk and a bottle of juice double bagged. If I take the milk out and remove the double bagging and just put the milk in the single bag and the juice in that single bag I’m still using two bags for these two items.
Her- no because you are not double bagging them so it’s not the same number of bags.
*me looking around at about 10 other customers who at this point are enjoying the show.
Me- is this likе that Common Core math stuff I keep hearing about?
Her- never mind you just don’t get it.
And with that, she went back to her little Podium so she could continue texting or playing games on her phone or whatever it was she was doing before she decided to come over and critique my bagging skiIIs.
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