‘Families don’t have to look the same’ – Black couple talks about their experience adopting three white children

Sadie and Jarvis Sampson tried for years to have a baby, using every method they could think of. They eventually accepted that they might only ever be an aunt and uncle. Then, one day, they got a text that changed their lives completely.

The couple had been trying to get pregnant since they got married in January 2018, but when it didn’t happen on its own, they tried everything else.

“We used ovulation tests, took prenatal vitamins, tracked cycles with apps, and used fertility monitors,” the Houston mom told Love What Matters.

“We even tried advice from friends, family, and strangers. For 14 months, we tried, prayed, and waited. Month after month, it was always a negative pregnancy test. It seemed like we might need help to conceive, so we even talked to doctors about it.”

Doctors didn’t offer much help to the couple. They mostly told Sadie to lose weight to improve her chances of getting pregnant. With no other advice, she had gastric surgery and lost 28 pounds.

Sadie’s OBGYN was excited about the weight loss and praised her for it.

“She told me that if I wasn’t pregnant within six months, she would refer me to a fertility specialist because she couldn’t prescribe fertility medication herself,” Sadie said. “I was thrilled! We finally got a positive step forward, even if it wasn’t immediate. We were excited about the progress.”

Unfortunately, the couple didn’t get pregnant after Sadie lost the weight, and they felt like they were back where they started.

“I always felt like I was meant to be a mother,” Sadie said. “Even though my surgeon warned me that I’d be very fertile after the surgery, I still wasn’t getting pregnant. So, we gave up and accepted that we might just be aunt and uncle to our nieces and godparents to our goddaughters.”

Just when the couple had decided to stop trying to have a baby, Sadie got a text from a friend asking if they would think about fostering a baby from a couple she knew.

At first, the couple was hesitant because they were told by a caseworker to take care of the baby while the birth mom was getting treatment. They worried they might get too attached. But then, the situation changed.

“The birth mom has decided she wants you to adopt the baby instead,” the caseworker said.

Sadie remembered saying, “‘Holy crap!!’ out loud when she found out she was going to be a mom.

“We went from having no kids to possibly fostering one, to suddenly being told, ‘You’re going to be parents!’ I was still in shock as I listened to the caseworker. I hung up and called my husband, shouting, ‘Babe!! They want us to adopt the baby! We’re going to be parents!’ He said, ‘Wait! REALLY?! I thought they just wanted us to foster him!’ I told him, ‘Nope! They want us to be his mom and dad.’”

The couple spent the weekend trying to take in the shocking news and getting ready, just in case the birth mom changed her mind.

By Monday, they were not only told that the birth mom still wanted them to adopt the baby, but she also wanted to do an independent adoption and was ready to sign the papers that day.

Their baby boy was born at just 33 weeks, which is seven weeks early. He weighed 4 lbs. 5 oz. “He was so tiny, he literally fit in one of my husband’s hands,” Sadie wrote.

“He was wrapped in a white blanket with pink and blue stripes,” Sadie said. “He had a small tube coming out of his nose because he couldn’t eat on his own since he was born early. But he was so cute!!!”

The couple shared their news on social media and were encouraged to create a registry. They listed 72 items, and within just three days, 55 of them were already bought for them.

Ezra Lee’s adoption was finalized in October 2020, and the couple had adorable family photos taken, all wearing t-shirts that said, “Families don’t have to match.”

In 2021, Sadie and Jarvis became parents to twin girls, Journee and Destinee, through embryo donation. True to their family motto, “Families don’t have to match,” the Black couple now has three white children – a boy and two girls.

For anyone who might judge their beautiful family, they have just one response: their family is built on the strongest foundation ever – love.

I sent daily letters to my son from a nursing home and heard nothing back, until a stranger arrived to take me home

After my son Tyler persuaded me to move into a nursing home, I began writing him daily letters to express how much I missed him. Despite my efforts, he never replied. Then one day, a stranger came to take me home.

When I turned 81, I was diagnosed with osteoporosis, which made it difficult for me to move around without help. This made it hard for Tyler and his wife, Macy, to care for me, so they decided I should go to a nursing home. Tyler told me they couldn’t care for me because of their busy lives and insisted the house I had lived in was too large for just me.

I was heartbroken as I realized their decision was less about my care and more about wanting my house for themselves. That night, I wondered what I had done wrong. I thought I had raised a good son, but his actions felt like a betrayal. Despite my pleas, Tyler and Macy took me to a nearby nursing home, promising to visit often. I hoped that moving there might not be so bad since they would come to see me. Little did I know, Tyler was just trying to get rid of me.

Days turned into years in the nursing home. Although the staff was kind and I enjoyed chatting with other residents, I longed for my family. Without a phone or tablet, I wrote daily letters to Tyler, asking him to visit or update me, but I never received a reply.

After two long years, I lost hope that anyone would come. Each night, I prayed to return home, but I tried not to get my hopes up. One day, however, my nurse told me a man was at the desk asking for me. Excitedly, I grabbed my walker, thinking it might be Tyler.

To my surprise, the man waiting for me was someone I hadn’t seen in years. It was Ron, a childhood friend of Tyler’s who had once lived with us. He greeted me warmly and explained that he had just returned from Europe. When I told him about my situation, he looked concerned and asked me to sit down.

Ron shared that Tyler and Macy had tragically died in a house fire the previous year. He had found their house abandoned and discovered my unread letters in the mailbox. Hearing about Tyler’s death filled me with conflicting emotions; despite my anger towards him, I felt heartbroken.

Ron stayed by my side as I cried, comforting me as I mourned my son and daughter-in-law. He reminded me of how I had taken him in as a child when he was in need. Unlike Tyler, Ron had grown up poor and had lost his parents, but I had treated him like my own. Ron then offered to take me home with him. I couldn’t believe it. My own son had sent me away, and now here was Ron, who wanted to care for me. Gratefully, I accepted his offer.

That night, Ron helped me pack my belongings and took me to his new home. He had a loving family who welcomed me with open arms. In those final years, I found happiness surrounded by people who truly cared for me.

It’s important to respect your elders and recognize their sacrifices. Tyler failed to appreciate all I had done for him and chose convenience over care. Family isn’t solely defined by blood; Ron, despite not being related, remembered my kindness and chose to repay it by taking me in and caring for me.

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