Mariska Hargitay’s journey to motherhood is truly inspiring. Known for her iconic role on “Law & Order: SVU,” her real-life story revolves around love, resilience, and the joy of raising three children. The actress’s path to building a family is filled with unexpected blessings and deep gratitude.
Mariska Hargitay’s journey into motherhood began in her early 40s when she gave birth to her first child. Despite the challenges of being a first-time mother later in life, she wholeheartedly and joyfully embraced motherhood.
Her family grew when she and her husband, actor Peter Hermann, welcomed two more children within a year. Each child brought unique blessings into their lives, and Mariska cherishes the unexpected path that led her to become a mother of three.
Long before becoming a mother, Mariska always envisioned having her own family. From a young age, she knew motherhood was part of her life plans, a desire deeply rooted in her own upbringing.
A Childhood of Glitz and Heartbreak: The Early Life of Mariska Hargitay
Mariska is an actress, who added producing and directing to her list of talents. She was born to the glamorous actress Jayne Mansfield and the former Mr. Universe Mickey Hargitay on January 23, 1964.
Being born into Hollywood royalty, Mariska’s early life was surrounded by fame and glitz. This set a unique backdrop for her childhood. However, her early years were also marked by tragedy.
When Mariska was just three years old, her mother died in a car accident on June 29, 1967. This loss left a lasting scar on the actress, both physically and emotionally.
The actress expressed, “I clearly was in that frozen place for a lot of my childhood—of trying to survive, actually trying to survive. My life has been a process of unpeeling the layers and trust and trusting again.”
Despite this tragic beginning, Mariska’s parents’ legacy played a significant role in shaping her character. Her father, Mickey, raised her with discipline and love, teaching her the importance of hard work and resilience.
He ensured she had a normal upbringing. Mariska joined the swim team, ran cross-country, played volleyball, and by 1982, she was crowned Miss Beverly Hills. Despite her accomplishments, she was always aware of the darker side of life.
The actress later explained that she learned about crisis early and realized that life offers no guarantees, but we must keep moving forward and transform our experiences.
She considers this ability to be her superpower and sees it as a gift from experiencing trauma early in life. Despite these challenges, Mariska went on to live a full and fulfilling life.
Embracing Motherhood: Mariska’s Journey from Daughter to Mom
For Mariska, 2004 marked the beginning of a new phase in her life. That year, she married Peter, and on June 28, 2006, the actress welcomed her first child, August Miklos Friedrich Hermann, at 42.
Starting this journey into motherhood was easy for Mariska as she knew from a young age that she was meant for it. Despite losing her mother, she never lacked a maternal figure in her life. The actress was raised by her father’s third wife, Ellen Siano Hargitay, who never made her feel like an outsider.
Mariska reminisced, “I called her Mom. She really claimed us. She never had biological kids of her own, and to this day we are her kids. So we were blessed that she really embraced us and loved us so quickly. And I was very fortunate to have a maternal figure in my life after such a horrific accident.”
Additionally, while Ellen’s motherly act prepared Mariska for being a mom, it also stirred in her the desire to have children by other means. The actress had grown up realizing that being a mother did not have to be biological.
A Dream Fulfilled: The Adoption of Amaya Josephine
After a few years of becoming parents, Mariska and Peter, who came from big families, decided it was time to expand theirs. They were also not the only ones clamoring for more kids around the house. Their son August also wanted siblings.
However, the actress was over 40, and at her age at the time, pregnancies were never easy. Knowing she and her husband had so much love to give, Mariska was hopeful. She said, “I was really letting the chips fall as they might, because I do think so much is up to God.”
Mariska didn’t know how she was going to have more children, but she knew it was something that would happen. The actress remarked, “I always said, ‘I don’t know how this is going to end up. I don’t know if I’m going to get pregnant and have twins.’”
Despite having no clue, there was something she was sure of, and that was adoption. She recalled not knowing if someone would leave a baby on her doorstep. Nevertheless, she said, “But I really did think that down the line, Peter and I would adopt a child. That was always part of the plan.”
In early April 2011, Mariska and Peter’s plan came to fruition as they welcomed their second child, Amaya Josephine Hermann. Their daughter had been born in the United States about a week before her adoption.
As soon as the couple decided to adopt, they did not limit themselves as they considered international and domestic adoption. Mariska revealed they had talked about the idea of mixed-race adoptions, and were excited to become a multi-racial family.
The actress’s excitement began even before Amaya joined the family. Mariska had revealed, “I’m deliriously happy. From the minute she was born, she was just surprisingly alert and so full of love.”
The second time Mother was not alone in her excitement. August, who was less than five at the time, was also happy to have a baby sister. His Mom disclosed, “He is over the moon. He calls her his baby because he says the whole thing was his idea. He always talks about how he’s going to protect her. He’s going to be a great big brother.”
A Brother’s Dream: The Joyous Arrival of Andrew Nicolas
August, who prided himself as a big brother, was very hands-on in his sister’s life. He reportedly even participated in picking out her name. However, seeing as he thought it was his idea for her to join the family, he wanted yet another sibling.
Six months after Amaya came home as a newborn, August’s wish was fulfilled as he welcomed his baby brother, Andrew Nicolas Hermann, in October 2011. This time, Andrew was not a newborn, as he had been born in the summer of that year.
Mariska noted, “August thinks this was all his idea! He said, ‘I want a baby sister,’ and Amaya came. Then he said, ‘I want a baby brother,’ and Andrew came. August is feeling pretty good and pretty powerful!”
While August Miklos Friedrich Hermann felt powerful, Mariska was feeling a range of positive emotions. She said, “We adopted Amaya, and Andrew, I always describe it as this angel that fell out of the sky, because he was a little unexpected. [sic]”
Andrew Nicolas, Peter Hermann, and Mariska Hargitay at the ceremony honoring Mariska Hargitay with a Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on November 8, 2013, in Hollywood. | Source: Getty Images
The adoption of Andrew was not something Peter and Mariska had planned for at the time it happened. The couple had initially planned to adopt another baby a year or more after Amaya joined their household.
However, things happened differently. The actress revealed that their lawyer suddenly called them to inform them about Andrew. Their lawyer noted that it was an amazing opportunity, and the couple, in that moment, had never been more sure about having him in their lives.
The swiftness and timing of Andrew joining their family makes the actress believe her son “fell out of the sky.” Nevertheless, Mariska knows that it’s not an easy journey.
She once remarked, “I’m not gonna lie, there were wrenching moments. I say to everybody, ‘Adoption is not for the faint of heart.’” But, on some days, the actress feels like she’s living in a dream world. She said, “I just sit and pinch myself.”
Mariska Hargitay with Amaya, Andrew, and August at The Children’s Museum Of The East End 5th Annual Family Fair on July 20, 2013, in Bridgehampton, New York. | Source: Getty Images
Family and Fulfillment: Mariska Hargitay on Life as a Mother of Three
At 47, Mariska, who initially didn’t think it was possible to love more than one kid, had become a mom of three. She said, “You know you have one kid, and then you think, oh my gosh, I’ll never love another kid, and then the second one comes, and you can’t believe that you love them, and then the third one fell out of sky.”
Becoming a mother did not only teach Mariska about her capacity to love, it did more. She noted, “Becoming a parent erased many of my negative childhood feelings and filled them in with something new,” some of which include trying out new cultures when it comes to their cuisines.
The actress is not the only one to have spoken to the media about their family of five. Peter Hermann’s love for his family is always evident even though gets private about their kids. However, he expressed his thoughts on the unconventional manner in which their family grew.
The actor divulged, “It’s funny, I always get so private about our kids, but I think that the easiest way or the easiest answer is we just wanted a bigger family and we feel incredibly blessed.”
In 2018, Mariska also opened up about her life with the kids as she graced the cover of People’s magazine. She said, “The thing that’s made me a better parent is my kids. Because they taught me to really listen. My husband is my North Star, and my kids are my teachers.”
Not only did they make her a better parent, they also gave her something perfect in life. The actress revealed, “Our family is so perfect, or at least perfect for me. Together we’re just this whole, happy, joyful, chaotic, crazy unit. I’ve never known anything that was more right.”
Despite having a crazy and chaotic unit, Mariska and Peter work together to get the results they desire. Even though they have different parenting styles, the couple complement each other, with the actress revealing that her husband knows everything she doesn’t know.
Shortly before turning 60 in 2024, Mariska reflected on her life’s journey, career, motherhood, and more. The actress had countless reasons to be thankful.
Peter Hermann and Mariska Hargitay with their children, August, Andrew, and Amaya at the 2023 Stuttering Association For The Young (SAY) Benefit Gala on May 22, 2023, in New York City. | Source: Getty Images
One of the things Mariska was thankful for was the timing when she started her family. She said, “I’m so grateful that I’m an older mom. Grateful that I became successful older. I don’t know if I could have handled it when I was younger.”
The actress then compared what she was like in her younger days. She remembered that in her younger years, she struggled to be present, but as she got older, she learned to accept and appreciate life more deeply.
She noted, “And now I’m going to savor this moment. I want to share my lessons and where there is pain that I can fix that really inspires me to lighten the load.”
Mariska’s journey shows her strength and love. Starting her family in her early 40s, she faced the challenges and joys of raising three children with Peter. Their story is full of unexpected blessings and deep gratitude. As she cherishes her family, Mariska inspires us to embrace life’s surprises and the power of love at any age.
My husband created a new schedule to ‘improve my role as a wife’ — I taught him a lesson in return
I was stunned when my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule to help me “become a better wife.” But instead of blowing up, I played along.Little did Jake know, I was about to teach him a lesson that would make him rethink his newfound approach to marriage.
I’ve always prided myself on being the level-headed one in our marriage. Jake, bless his heart, could get swept up in things pretty easily, whether it was a new hobby, or some random YouTube video that promised to change his life in three easy steps.
But we were solid until Jake met Steve. Steve was the type of guy who thought being loudly opinionated made him right, the type that talks right over you when you try to correct him.
He was also a perpetually single guy (who could have guessed?), who graciously dispensed relationship advice to all his married colleagues, Jake included. Jake should’ve known better, but my darling husband was positively smitten with Steve’s confidence.
I didn’t think much of it until Jake started making some noxious comments.
“Steve says relationships work best when the wife takes charge of the household,” he’d say. Or “Steve thinks it’s important for women to look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been married.”
I’d roll my eyes and reply with some sarcastic remark, but it was getting under my skin. Jake was changing. He’d arch his eyebrows if I ordered takeout instead of cooking, and sigh when I let the laundry pile up because, God forbid, I had my own full-time job.
And then it happened. One night, he came home with The List.
He sat me down at the kitchen table, unfolded a piece of paper, and slid it across to me.
“I’ve been thinking,” he started, his voice dripping with a condescending tone I hadn’t heard from him before. “You’re a great wife, Lisa. But there’s room for improvement.”
My eyebrows shot up. “Oh really?”
He nodded, oblivious to the danger zone he was entering. “Yeah. Steve helped me realize that our marriage could be even better if you, you know, stepped up a bit.”
I stared at the paper in front of me. It was a schedule… and he’d written “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife” at the top in bold.
This guy had actually sat down and mapped out my entire week based on what Steve — a single guy with zero relationship experience — thought I should do to “improve” myself as a wife.
I was supposed to wake up at 5 a.m. every day to make Jake a gourmet breakfast. Then I’d hit the gym for an hour to “stay in shape.”
After that? A delightful lineup of chores: cleaning, laundry, ironing. And that was all before I left for work. I was supposed to cook a meal from scratch every evening and make fancy snacks for Jake and his friends when they came over to hang out at our place.
The whole thing was sexist and insulting on so many levels I didn’t even know where to start. I ended up staring at him, wondering if my husband had lost his mind.
“This will be great for you, and us,” he continued, oblivious.
“Steve says it’s important to maintain structure, and I think you could benefit from —”
“I could benefit from what?” I interrupted, my voice dangerously calm. Jake blinked, caught off guard by the interruption, but he recovered quickly.
“Well, you know, from having some guidance and a schedule.”
I wanted to throw that paper in his face and ask him if he’d developed a death wish. Instead, I did something that surprised even me: I smiled.
“You’re right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’m so lucky that you made me this schedule. I’ll start tomorrow.”
The relief on his face was instant. I almost felt sorry for him as I got up and stuck the list on the fridge. Almost. He had no idea what was coming.
The next day, I couldn’t help but smirk as I studied the ridiculous schedule again. If Jake thought he could hand me a list of “improvements,” then he was about to find out just how much structure our life could really handle.
I pulled out my laptop, opened up a fresh document, and titled it, “Jake’s Plan for Becoming the Best Husband Ever.” He wanted a perfect wife? Fine. But there was a cost to perfection.
I began by listing all the things he had suggested for me, starting with the gym membership he was so keen on. It was laughable, really.
“$1,200 for a personal trainer.” I typed, barely containing my giggle.
Next came the food. If Jake wanted to eat like a king, that wasn’t happening on our current grocery budget. Organic, non-GMO, free-range everything? That stuff didn’t come cheap.
“$700 per month for groceries,” I wrote. He’d probably need to chip in for a cooking class too. Those were pricey, but hey, perfection wasn’t free.
I leaned back in my chair, laughing to myself as I imagined Jake’s face when he saw this. But I wasn’t done. Oh no, the pièce de résistance was still to come.
See, there was no way I could juggle all these expectations while holding down my job. If Jake wanted me to dedicate myself full-time to his absurd routine, then he’d have to compensate for the loss of my income.
I pulled up a calculator, estimating the value of my salary. Then, I added it to the list, complete with a little note: “$75,000 per year to replace Lisa’s salary since she will now be your full-time personal assistant, maid, and chef.”
My stomach hurt from laughing at this point.
And just for good measure, I threw in a suggestion about him needing to expand the house. After all, if he was going to have his friends over regularly, they’d need a dedicated space that wouldn’t intrude on my newly organized, impossibly structured life.
“$50,000 to build a separate ‘man cave’ so Jake and his friends don’t disrupt Lisa’s schedule.”
By the time I was done, the list was a masterpiece. A financial and logistical nightmare, sure, but a masterpiece nonetheless. It wasn’t just a counterattack — it was a wake-up call.
I printed it out, set it neatly on the kitchen counter, and waited for Jake to come home. When he finally walked through the door that evening, he was in a good mood.
“Hey, babe,” he called out, dropping his keys on the counter. He spotted the paper almost immediately. “What’s this?”
I kept my face neutral, fighting the urge to laugh as I watched him pick it up. “Oh, it’s just a little list I put together for you,” I said sweetly, “to help you become the best husband ever.”
Jake chuckled, thinking I was playing along with his little game. But as he scanned the first few lines, the grin started to fade. I could see the wheels turning in his head, the slow realization that this wasn’t the lighthearted joke he thought it was.
“Wait… what is all this?” He squinted at the numbers, his eyes widening as he saw the total costs. “$1,200 for a personal trainer? $700 a month for groceries? What the hell, Lisa?”
I leaned against the kitchen island, crossing my arms.
“Well, you want me to wake up at 5 a.m., hit the gym, make gourmet breakfasts, clean the house, cook dinner, and host your friends. I figured we should budget for all of that, don’t you think?”
His face turned pale as he flipped through the pages. “$75,000 a year? You’re quitting your job?!”
I shrugged. “How else am I supposed to follow your plan? I can’t work and be the perfect wife, right?”
He stared at the paper, dumbfounded.
The numbers, the absurdity of his own demands, it all hit him at once. His smugness evaporated, replaced by a dawning realization that he had seriously, seriously messed up.
“I… I didn’t mean…” Jake stammered, looking at me with wide eyes. “Lisa, I didn’t mean for it to be like this. I just thought —”
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