I Chose Not to Include My Daughter-in-Law on a Family Vacation, and I Believe My Decision Was Justified

But every trip was a reminder of how connected we were and how much we valued this time together. It was a break from our everyday lives, a chance to let loose and just be, at least for some time.

“Mom, do you remember that time at the beach house when Kayla fell off the dock?” Evelyn would laugh, nudging her sister.

“Don’t remind me!” Kayla groaned, but she couldn’t help smiling. “I still can’t believe you all left me in the water like that.”

“We didn’t leave you, sweetheart. We were laughing too hard to pull you out,” I would tease, shaking my head.

These moments were precious, and I held onto them fiercely. But things started to change when Liam, my only son, got married to Beth.

Beth was sweet when they first met. Quiet, reserved, but kind-hearted. I was genuinely happy for them, and when they got married, I welcomed her into our family with open arms. Naturally, I invited her to join us on our girls’ trips. I wanted her to feel included, to be a part of our little tradition. It felt right at the time.

At first, Beth fit in well enough. She was always polite, maybe a little shy, but I thought she’d warm up eventually. She wasn’t as chatty as my girls, but she seemed to enjoy the trips. We all tried to make her feel comfortable.

“So, Beth,” Kayla asked one afternoon as we sat in a café on one of our trips. “What was it like growing up in Maine? I’ve always wanted to visit.”

Beth smiled softly, twirling the straw in her iced coffee. “It was nice. Quiet. Not much to do in my town, but the summers were beautiful.”

The conversation felt a bit forced, but we all chalked it up to Beth needing time to adjust. She’d become part of our family, and I wanted her to feel like she belonged.

But after Beth gave birth to her son, Lucas, things changed. She gained a lot of weight during pregnancy, which isn’t unusual. However, eight years later, she still hadn’t lost the baby weight.

I noticed how much it was affecting her, not just physically but in the way she moved and interacted with us. It was becoming harder to include her in our trips.

One day, we were out shopping. It was supposed to be a fun, lighthearted afternoon, just like old times. We’d hit the mall, grabbed lunch, and made our way through the stores, chatting and laughing. But Beth kept falling behind.

I glanced back and saw her sitting on a bench near the entrance of a department store. She looked exhausted, wiping the sweat from her brow. “You guys go ahead,” she said, breathing heavily. “I’ll catch up.”

Evelyn raised an eyebrow at me, trying to hide her frustration. “Mom, do we need to wait again?”

I sighed. “Let’s just give her a few minutes.”

But those few minutes turned into long stretches of waiting. We’d walk ahead, browse through the racks, and eventually circle back to find Beth still sitting there. It was becoming a pattern — and not just on that day. Every trip we went on, we had to slow down, stop more often, and accommodate her.

By the time we left the mall that day, the mood had shifted. What was supposed to be a carefree afternoon felt strained, and my girls were clearly frustrated.

“Mom, I hate to say it, but these trips aren’t the same anymore,” Kayla said as we loaded the shopping bags into the car.

“I know,” I replied, running a hand through my hair. “I just… I don’t want to leave her out.”

Evelyn nodded, her face softening. “We get it. But we can’t keep doing this. It’s not fair to us either.”

I couldn’t argue with that. I knew they were right. The truth was, Beth’s presence had begun to change the dynamic of our trips, and not for the better.

We were holding back, compromising our enjoyment to accommodate her. And it wasn’t just about walking slower or sitting more. It felt like the whole energy of our outings was different.

The tipping point came when we started planning our annual trip to the pumpkin patch and apple orchard. It’s a tradition we’ve had for years — my favorite time of the year.

The fall colors, the smell of apples in the air, the laughter as we wandered through the orchard picking fruit. It was something we all looked forward to.

As we sat around the kitchen table, Evelyn looked up from her phone. “So, are we inviting Beth this year?”

I hesitated. We all knew what that would mean. Long breaks, slow walks, and probably missing out on some of the things we enjoyed most about the trip.

“I don’t think it’s a good idea,” I finally said, my voice low. “It’s a lot of walking, and… well, you know.”

Kayla sighed with relief. “I’m glad you said it, Mom. It’s been hard with her.”

“We haven’t had a proper girls’ day in so long,” Lauren added, looking at her sisters. “I miss the way things used to be.”

The truth was staring me in the face, and there was no avoiding it.
That’s when I made the decision not to invite Beth. It wasn’t easy, but I told myself it was for the best. My daughters deserved a day to relax and enjoy themselves without constantly having to adjust to Beth’s limitations.

The day of the trip came, and it was perfect. The weather was crisp, the leaves were golden and red, and we spent the entire day walking through the orchard, picking apples, and laughing.

We didn’t have to stop or slow down. It was like the old days, just me and my girls. I even posted a few pictures on Facebook, not thinking much of it.

But later that night, my phone rang. It was Beth.

I took a deep breath before answering. “Hi, Beth.”

“Lilian, I saw the pictures on Facebook,” she said, her voice tense. “Why wasn’t I invited?”

I felt my stomach drop. I knew this conversation was coming, but I wasn’t prepared. “Oh, it was just a small trip,” I stammered. “Nothing big.”

“But I’m family,” Beth said, her voice rising. “Why didn’t you invite me?”

There it was. The question I had been dreading. I could’ve lied, made up some excuse, but what would be the point? The truth was staring me in the face, and there was no avoiding it.

“Beth,” I said softly, trying to choose my words carefully. “It’s not that we don’t want you there. It’s just… well, the walking. You’ve needed a lot of breaks, and it’s made it hard for us to enjoy the trips the way we used to.”

Silence hung in the air for what felt like an eternity.

“So, you didn’t invite me because of my weight?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.

I swallowed hard. “Yes,” I admitted, guilt washing over me. “It’s been difficult. We’ve had to change the way we do things, and… I didn’t want to say anything, but it’s affected our trips.”

Beth was quiet for a moment, and I could feel the hurt radiating through the phone. “I thought I was part of this family,” she finally said, her voice trembling. “I thought you cared about me.”

“I do care about you, Beth—”

“No, you don’t,” she interrupted. “If you did, you wouldn’t have excluded me like this. You wouldn’t make me feel like an outsider.”

And with that, she hung up. I sat there, staring at the phone, my heart heavy with regret.

Later that night, Liam texted me. “Mom, Beth’s really hurt. You need to apologize.”

I read the text over and over, feeling torn. Should I apologize? Was I wrong to protect this time with my daughters? I wasn’t sure anymore.

The next morning, I talked to the girls. “Do you think I was too harsh?” I asked as we sat around the kitchen table.

“No, Mom,” Evelyn said, shaking her head. “We love Beth, but it’s not fair to us either. Our trips haven’t been the same.”

Kayla nodded. “We just want to enjoy ourselves like we used to. You did the right thing.”

Their reassurance helped, but I couldn’t shake the guilt. I didn’t want to hurt Beth, but I couldn’t ignore the strain her presence had put on our trips.

I’d reached my limit. Maybe I could’ve handled it better, maybe I should’ve been kinder, but the truth was out now.

I still don’t know if I made the right decision. All I wanted was to protect the bond I had with my daughters. But now I wonder if that decision has cost me something far greater.

Do you think I handled it correctly? What would you have done in my place?

The story of Lizzie Velásquez – this is her today in 2024

Every person faces their own struggles when it comes to their looks and/or self-esteem.

It might be that you want to lose weight, or maybe you want to fix your teeth? There’s always something that you’d probably like to improve.

Well, every time I feel like I need motivation, I’ll always think about Lizzie Velásquez from Austin, Texas.

Lizzie was born with an extremely rare genetic disorder that prevents her from gaining weight, which in turn affects her appearance.

Being tormented can break any person’s heart and mind, but Lizzie was confident that these people wouldn’t be the ones prevailing. Today, she’s turned her life around and she’s now a global motivational speaker.

Lizzie Velásquez
Facebook / Lizzie Velásquez

Now, I want you, the person reading this, to take a moment to think back on your life at the age of 16. For me, there are plenty of memories from that time – both good and bad – but overall, it was a time when many things were changing. There were more hormones, emotions, and sometimes even mental challenges that you had to fight against.

Hate on the web

All in all, hopefully it was a good time in your life, as it was for me.

Now, pretend that at 16 years of age you were called “The Ugliest Woman/Man in the World”. Not only that, but there’s even a video of you with the text “The Ugliest Woman/Man in the World” attached to it. That video has hundreds of thousands of views, and in the comments, people are saying the worst possible things about you.

How would that make you feel?

Lizzie Velásquez
Facebook / Lizzie Velásquez

For Lizzie Velásquez, this was the tragic reality. She was teased throughout her school years – both in person and on the internet – and it could’ve so easily broken her.

But Lizzie had other plans. She decided to put all these negative vibes together and instead turn them into something positive. That’s why we love her dearly, and want to spread her inspirational story.

I will share this with my friends, and I’d love for you to do the same.

Lizzie Velásquez

Lizzie Velásquez was born March 13, 1989, in Austin, Texas.

At her birth, she weighed only 2 pounds and 11 ounces, and it was clear from the moment she was born that she looked different from the other babies at the hospital.

Being that small, Lizzie didn’t understand that she was different, since she’d always been just Lizzie. However, when she started kindergarden at age five, she realized straight away that something was off.

“To my family, I was just Lizzie. It was a big slap of reality for a 5-year-old. The other kids were scared of me, pointing at me, not wanting to sit with me,” she told Today. “I couldn’t process it. I wasn’t doing anything to them, so why was it happening to me? And I didn’t dare tell anyone.

“Finally, I told my parents and they said, ‘There is nothing wrong with you, you are just smaller than the other kids. You are beautiful and smart and can accomplish anything.’”

Lizzie Velásquez
Instagram / Lizzie Velásquez

Those words from her family still stick with her today, and it really is the truth. No matter how you look, you still have the ability to accomplish anything you want. For Lizzie, though, this would require strong mental toughness to get there. That, and the support from her parents.

Lizzie Velásquez – rare conditions

But we’ll get back to Lizzie and how she managed to come out strong and incredibly inspirational on the other side.

So what was it that made her look the way she does?

Well, Lizzie was born with two rare conditions, marfan syndrome and lipodystrophy. The rare genetic conditions affect her heart, eyes and bones, and prevent her from gaining weight because of a problem with the way fat is distributed in her body. It’s so rare, in fact, that there are only three known cases in the world. Still to this day, it baffles experts.

Not only that, but the condition causes Lizzie to age faster than people without the disorder, and she’s also blind in one eye.

As early as kindergarden, Lizzie recieved comments from other kids. And these remarks continued throughout her childhood, with people labeling her face as “disgusting”.

“At the time, I thought everyone looked like me. I didn’t recognize or tell that they didn’t look like me,” she told the Daily Mail.

When Lizzie started high school, things got better. She realized that she had power over her own life, and her decision was made clear.

Horrible video on YouTube

She was always going to stay positive, be brave, and do all the activities that she wanted to do alongside her friends.

“It was scary, but I knew it would pay off,” Lizzie Velásquez explained. “I was staff writer for the school newspaper and took photos for the yearbook. I tried out for cheerleading. The uniforms were really cute and every time I wore it around the school, I felt like a superhero. I was more myself around my peers, the version of myself around my family.”

Things started to get better, and Lizzie’s confidence was great. Then, one day, her world collapsed.

While doing homework, she was scrolling on her computer and went onto YouTube. Suddenly, she saw a video about herself that would break her heart.

Someone had made a video about Lizzie, dubbing her “the world’s ugliest woman”. Worse, the video had millions of views, and some of the comments were truly terrible.

She couldn’t stop herself from reading the comments, with some people even saying that the world would be a better place if Lizzie took her own life. She read on, hoping that someone would come to her aid. Sadly, not a single comment did.

“Wanted to prove them wrong”

Lizzie felt like someone “was putting a fist through the computer screen and physically punching me.” She could barely believe what she was seeing.

It’s crazy to think about how thousands of people can sit behind their computers and torment a 16-year-old girl suffering from a severe illness. How do those people sleep at night?

This was the worst kind of hate, and it could’ve destroyed Lizzie. But once again, she picked herself up. In fact, she said that if she could, she’d send a thank you card and flowers to the person who created the video, because that video changed her life forever.

“I didn’t want to retaliate — it was a waste of time,” she said. “I just wanted to prove them wrong, I realized I could use it for the greater good.”

Lizzie was never going to let the haters win. She’d seen the worst possible things written and said about her, but still, she was determined to use it as fuel for the future Lizzie.

Lizzie Velásquez
Facebook / Lizzie Velásquez

She continued on to college, and at 23 she earned a Bachelors Degree in communication from Texas State University.

Inspirational TedTalk

In 2003, she was then invited to a TED Talk in Austin, and it went viral. Lizzie explained how hurtful the mocking had been, but at the same time, she wanted to give people another perspective, as she did for herself.

“For so long, I thought that what defined me was my outer appearance,” she said in the 2013 TED Talk, explaining that she used to fantasize about “scrubbing the syndrome” off her face.

“Something kind of clicked in my head,” she explained of the moment she saw that awful YouTube video. “Am I going to let the people who called me a monster define me? No, I’m going to let my goals and my success and my accomplishments be the things that define me.”

For most people, all this hatred would have been tough to endure. But Lizzie isn’t most people; she showed everyone how strong she really is. Over the course of her entire life, she has been forced to eat a high-calorie diet frequently to keep her body’s energy levels up.

Today, she’s 35 years old and a successful business woman who travels the world to lecture others on her illness, as well as her life story.

Lizzie Velásquez – today

“This is my purpose. This is what I’m meant to do for the rest of my life. I like to think that I’m not only telling my story, I’m telling everyone’s story,” Lizzie told the Daily Mail.

As of now, she has over 850,000 followers on her YouTube channel and uses it to give inspirational talks. Lizzie’s showed the haters that she’s stronger than them – and she’s much more successful today than they will ever be.

“You are beautiful and smart and can accomplish anything,” Lizzie said her mother and father used to tell her.

“They loved me in the face of so many unknowns.”

Even though Lizzie is a strong, inspirational and, well, incredible person, this year’s been tough for many reasons.

Lizzie Velásquez
Instagram / Lizzie Velásquez

The Covid-19 pandemic hasn’t helped, but she’s also getting picked on social media, especially on the app TikTok. Lizzie was the subject of an image that people were looking at and reacting to.

And the worst part was that it was a mother that had used her photo to prank a child into thinking that Lizzie was the teacher for the next school year.

The importance of respecting

In July, it became a horrible trend among parents, where they did a FaceTime call saying that Lizzie would be the child’s next teacher.

Lizzie was hurt, obviously, and rightly so. What kind of parent would do this to another person? What message does it send to their children? That this kind of hate is OK? Lizzie herself said it encourages children to react in an unfavorable way regarding the way people look.

“When kids are in school or whether they are out in public, it’s crucial to teach them the importance of respecting someone who doesn’t look like them,” Lizzie said, in a video posted on her social media accounts.

“Showing them a video might be a joke, but it can be something that shows a child if my mom or dad thinks it’s funny then it must be okay for me to laugh at as well,” she says. “I take great responsibility in the fact that now is the time time to do all I can to speak up for those who might not have a voice or for those who don’t know how to use theirs.”

“I knew in my gut my photo was going to be used,” she added. “After dealing with things like this for a while now, I can sense when this might happen.”

A true inspiration

Following Lizzie condemning the videos, many children instead started posting videos where they said how beautiful Lizzie was. Once again, the haters had lost.

Lizzie has been praised all over the world for her courage throughout her life. She’s written a best-selling book about her life and even been praised by former First Lady Michelle Obama.

Beauty comes from within your heart and soul. Lizzie, you are beautiful! We think her story is deeply inspirational, and we think that everyone should read about her to understand that anything is possible.

Please, share this story with friends and family if you think Lizzie is an incredible person!

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