Falling in love is a magical experience. It’s filled with excitement, butterflies, and a deep desire to make the best impression on the person we adore. In those early stages, we often tweak our behavior, carefully curating how we present ourselves. Something as simple as avoiding lollipops—fearing it may make us seem childish—symbolizes this phase of self-conscious love.
However, as a relationship matures, especially after marriage, things change. The need to impress fades, and the comfort of unconditional acceptance sets in. That once-hidden love for lollipops (or any quirky habit) resurfaces, representing a return to one’s true self.
Why Do We Hide Our True Selves in the Beginning?
When we first start dating, we unknowingly step into a highlight reel version of ourselves. We filter our habits, polish our words, and refine our actions to seem more attractive. But why?
1. The Desire to Impress
At the start of a relationship, we want to be seen in the best light. Whether it’s dressing perfectly, avoiding certain foods, or hiding silly habits, we make an effort to be someone our partner will admire.
2. Fear of Being Judged
We all have quirks—maybe you love collecting action figures, singing off-key in the shower, or eating candy like a child. But in the early stages, there’s a fear that revealing too much too soon could push the other person away.
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3. Society’s Expectations
Romantic relationships, especially new ones, are often shaped by social norms and expectations. Acting “mature” or “refined” seems like the right thing to do, even if it means suppressing natural instincts like enjoying a simple lollipop.
How Marriage Changes Everything
Marriage is not just about love; it’s about comfort, trust, and deep acceptance. Once you’ve committed to each other for life, the need to impress fades, and true personalities begin to shine.
1. The Comfort of Being Yourself
In a long-term relationship, you stop overthinking every action. You no longer worry if eating candy makes you seem childish, if watching cartoons is immature, or if wearing pajamas all day is unattractive. You embrace your true self because you know your partner loves you for who you are, not for the polished version you once presented.
2. Love Shifts from Attraction to Connection
Attraction may have sparked the relationship, but emotional connection sustains it. What makes a marriage strong is genuine companionship, built on shared experiences and authenticity. That means letting your guard down—whether that’s laughing at silly jokes, dancing like no one’s watching, or, yes, eating that lollipop with pride.
3. Unconditional Acceptance
Real love isn’t about impressing; it’s about accepting. Marriage teaches you that your quirks, habits, and imperfections are what make you unique—and those are often the things your partner grows to love the most.
The Evolution of Love: From Perfection to Authenticity
Every relationship goes through stages of transformation. The love that starts with perfection-seeking gradually matures into comfort-driven authenticity.
Stage 1: The “Best Behavior” Phase
In the beginning, you avoid anything that might make you seem less attractive or mature. You wear your best clothes, avoid messy foods, and pretend you don’t binge-watch cartoons.
Stage 2: The Gradual Unveiling
As you get more comfortable, little pieces of the real you start slipping out. Maybe you start eating lollipops in front of your partner, or you admit to loving cheesy romance novels. You test the waters to see if they still find you charming despite your quirks.
Stage 3: The Marriage Comfort Zone
By the time you’re married, there’s no need for facades. You eat what you want, laugh as loudly as you please, and fully embrace your unique personality. Your partner loves you for all of it—including the quirks you once tried to hide.
What This Teaches Us About True Love
1. You Deserve to Be Loved for Who You Are
If you feel the need to hide parts of yourself to keep someone interested, they may not be the right person for you. The right relationship allows you to be yourself from the start.
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2. Authenticity Leads to Deeper Connections
Love isn’t about pretending to be perfect—it’s about being real, raw, and vulnerable. The more you embrace your true self, the stronger your bond will be.
3. The Best Relationships Feel Like Home
In a lasting love story, your partner becomes your safe space—the person with whom you can be 100% yourself. If eating lollipops brings you joy, they won’t just accept it; they’ll probably buy you a lifetime supply.
Final Thoughts: Love is About Being Yourself
At the start of a relationship, it’s natural to want to impress, but true love is about acceptance, not perfection. The shift from hiding small quirks to embracing them openly is a sign of a healthy, growing relationship.
So, if you ever hesitated to eat a lollipop because you were afraid of being judged—go ahead and unwrap it now. If you’re with the right person, they’ll love watching you enjoy it.
Sir Elton John’s Surprising Parenting Method: His 2 Sons Do Chores for Pocket Money
Sir Elton John and his husband, David Furnish, have been together for more than 20 years. They have two sons, Zackary and Elijah, and they are working hard to raise them to be humble and understand the value of money.
Sir Elton John is a famous musician with 32 albums and shows no signs of slowing down. At 73, he still gets many gig bookings.
Even though Sir Elton John has had a successful career for over 30 years, he is now focusing more on his personal life, including his marriage to David Furnish and their two sons, Zachary and Elijah.
Before becoming a parent, John and Furnish had a whirlwind romance that began in 1993. John said he returned to his home in Windsor and wanted to meet new people, so he asked a friend to organize a dinner. David Furnish was among the guests, and John felt an immediate connection with him. He liked that Furnish was a bit shy and dressed nicely.
The next day, they went on a date, which led to their long-term relationship. They were in a civil partnership for nine years and got married in 2014. They shared their wedding day with their sons, who were ring bearers, and posted about it on Instagram.
For John and Furnish, sharing their special day with their kids was heartwarming, especially since their journey to becoming parents was challenging. In 2009, they connected with a Ukrainian boy named Lev at an orphanage for children with HIV. They wanted to help him because he came from a broken family, but the government didn’t allow it since Lev was considered too old. Despite this, they continued to support and talk to him
Meeting Lev made John realize that he could become a father. He admitted he never thought he’d have kids because he felt too old. Shortly after, they had their first son, Zachary, in 2010 via surrogate, and their second son, Elijah, in 2013.
**Raising Kids Out of the Spotlight**
Even with their busy lives, the couple wanted to be very involved in their children’s lives. “We don’t want to leave raising our kids to nannies and housekeepers,” said Furnish. Becoming parents was the best decision for them, and their main goal now is to raise their sons to be happy and healthy.
John wrote a touching letter to his sons, saying how much they have changed his life. “Zachary and Elijah, you are the greatest gifts I’ve ever received. You’ve filled my heart with love and my life with purpose and meaning in ways I didn’t think were possible,” the singer wrote.
John and Furnish are proud of their family and want their children to always remember the love and support they will receive from their parents.
Since becoming parents, John has talked about how his views on life have changed. He and his husband now focus more on spending quality time with their sons than on material things. John admitted that they used to spend a lot before having kids, but now they have cut back and focus on only what they need.
The couple has also been teaching their children about the value of money and the effort needed to earn it. John knows his kids have a comfortable life but wants them to stay humble. He doesn’t plan to leave them his entire estate. Instead, he wants to provide a good life while keeping them grounded. He explained:
“Of course, I want to leave my boys in a good financial position. But giving kids everything can ruin their lives.”
From when their sons were toddlers, John has worked to teach them about money. At ages five and three, Zachary and Elijah might not have fully grasped their parents’ fame, but John and Furnish taught them about saving and spending.
Back in 2016, John shared that the boys would earn £3 ($3.74) for doing chores around the kitchen or garden. They would then split their money into three categories: charity, savings, and spending. As they grew older, their chores included cleaning their rooms, and they earned stars for each task they completed.
Although their children’s lives are far from ordinary, John and Furnish strive to keep things as normal as possible. John mentioned that their kids live like local children and are not isolated behind the gates of a mansion.
When asked about raising his kids in the spotlight, John acknowledged the challenges but said he finds the public “brilliant” and “not hostile.” He doesn’t mind taking photos with his family and enjoys spending time with them outside their home, like going out for pizza or a movie.
John makes sure not to miss important moments with his children due to his fame. He often picks them up and drops them off at school.
**Elton John Shows Off His Sons**
John and his husband usually keep their sons away from social media, but the “Rocket Man” singer recently shared a rare photo of Furnish, their sons, and their godmother, Lady Gaga. John expressed his sadness at not being able to join them for the photo but sent his love.
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