When Millie Smith and Lewis Cann found out they were expecting a baby, they were overjoyed. As there was a history of twins in Millie’s family, she had a strong feeling that she was going to give birth to two little ones, and her instincts were right. The ultrasound confirmed that she was indeed expecting twins, but the doctors told them that one of the babies had a very small chance of survival.
ragically, one of their daughters was born at 30 weeks with anencephaly, a serious condition that affects the development of the brain and spinal cord. They learned that their precious baby had only moments or hours to live.
Knowing this, Millie and Lewis wanted to give her a name before they said goodbye. They chose the name Skye. Millie explained: “We felt she needed a name before she arrived. Knowing she wouldn’t be with us for long, I wanted her to have a name in those fleeting moments”.
The name “Skye” symbolized a connection to a place they could always remember when they looked up to the sky. “We held Skye close as she died. It was the most heartbreaking moment of our lives, but I’m proud that she fought to spend that time with us.” Skye only lived for three hours, a brief time filled with love while her parents cherished her beauty and presence.
After her death, Millie and Lewis were supported by a “bereavement midwife” and given access to a “Daisy Room”, a special room where parents could spend time with their baby before and after death. However, after Skye was gone, her memory seemed to fade; no one spoke of her, leaving Millie feeling like her daughter had never existed, which made her angry.
“Most of the nurses knew what had happened, but as the weeks went by, people stopped mentioning Skye. Other families around me had no idea about our loss”, Millie recalls.
While her other daughter, Callie, was still in the NICU, another mother who knew nothing about Millie’s situation remarked how lucky she was not to have twins. “None of the other parents knew about Skye, and that innocent comment almost broke me. I left the room in tears but didn’t have the heart to explain”, Millie said. “A simple sticker could have prevented this.”
This experience inspired Millie to design a sticker for incubators to mark the loss of one or more babies in a multiple birth. She chose butterflies to symbolise the ‘flown away’ babies and used the colour purple, which is suitable for any gender.
From this idea grew the Skye High Foundation, which promotes the Purple Butterflies initiative and helps raise awareness in hospitals around the world. The foundation also offers a range of purple butterfly merchandise.
“Although I can’t prevent these situations from occurring, I believe the more support we can provide through initiatives like the stickers, the better it will be for others who suffer this loss. It’s an incredibly tough journey”, said Millie. Today, her surviving daughter Callie is seven years old.
My Husband Refuses to Help with Our Crying Baby at Night, Puts on Headphones & Listens to Calming Music – I Taught Him a Lesson
Scarlett is at her wit’s end, balancing a demanding career and a teething baby while her husband, Dave, sleeps peacefully with noise-canceling headphones. When he dismisses her pleas for help, Scarlett hatches a cunning plan to make him experience her sleepless nights.
I need to vent about something.
My name’s Scarlett, and I’ve been married to Dave for 25 years. We’ve got three kids: a 12-year-old soccer fanatic, an 8-year-old aspiring astronaut, and our newest addition, Lily, who’s six months old.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my kids to bits, but balancing a demanding career and raising these little humans is no joke.
Dave and I used to be this power couple. But lately, he’s been avoiding his share of nighttime baby duty.
Picture this: I’m pacing the room with a screaming, teething baby at 2 a.m., while he’s blissfully asleep, noise-canceling headphones on, listening to some darn calming ocean waves or whatever. It’s infuriating!
So, here’s the setup. It was one of those nights. Lily was teething and inconsolable. I’d tried everything—rocking, feeding, singing lullabies. Nothing worked. Exhausted and at my wits’ end, I shook Dave awake.
“Dave, I need help. Lily’s been crying for hours,” I pleaded, my voice barely masking my frustration.
He groaned and pulled off his headphones. “Scarlett, I have to be up early. My job is demanding. Can’t you handle it?”
“Seriously, Dave?” I snapped, feeling the hot sting of tears in my eyes. “I’ve been handling it all night. I need some support here.”
He rolled his eyes and turned away. “I need my sleep. I can’t function at work if I’m exhausted.”
That was it. The tipping point. His words stung more than they should have. I felt like I was drowning, and he was just floating by, oblivious. Something had to change. I couldn’t keep feeling this undervalued and alone.
That’s when I hatched my plan.
I’m not proud of it, but desperate times call for desperate measures. I decided to modify his precious headphones, planting a hidden speaker controlled by my phone. Yeah, it was sneaky, but I was desperate for him to understand my struggle.
I activated the speaker. The sound of a baby crying filled his headphones. He shot up, confused and irritated.
“Scarlett, did you hear that?” he mumbled, rubbing his eyes.
“Hear what?” I replied, feigning ignorance.
He shook his head and stumbled over to Lily’s crib.
“Dave, I think you’re just stressed,” I said, keeping my voice calm. “Maybe you should help with Lily more often. It might help you sleep better.”
He stared at me, and I could see the wheels turning in his head.
“Yeah, maybe,” he muttered, but the doubt was there.
By the end of the week, Dave was a wreck.
He was snapping at the kids, his patience worn thin.
“Scarlett, I don’t know what’s going on, but I can’t take this anymore. I’m hearing things, and I’m exhausted.”
I bit my lip, feeling a mix of guilt and satisfaction.
“Dave, we need to talk,” I said, my voice steady but filled with the weight of the past few nights.
He looked at me, his eyes bloodshot and weary. “What is it? Just tell me.”
One peaceful night, after a particularly calm evening with Lily finally asleep, we crawled into bed, both of us utterly exhausted. Dave pulled me close, his arm wrapped around me.
“Scarlett,” he whispered, his voice filled with gratitude, “thank you.”
I smiled, feeling a sense of contentment wash over me. “Thank you, Dave,” I whispered back. “For being my partner.”
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