Marlo Thomas and Phil Donahue actually wrote the marital handbook.
The long-married couple’s book, What Makes a Marriage Last: Insider Stories, contains personal facts about their marriage. Forty Well-Known Couples Share Their Secrets with Us.
The most fascinating revelation made by Marlo is that, even though she and Phil have been married for over 40 years, she never really wanted to get married.
The famous person expressed in the book her previously negative opinion of the institution, saying that marriage is like a vacuum cleaner that sucks away all of your ambition and vitality when you stick it to your ear.
Thomas frequently shares her opinions, likening marriage to having to placate a prisoner. That is, until she met Donahue.
Phil Donahue and Marlo Thomas met following the dissolution of their first marriage, and they have remained lifelong friends ever since.
The Phil Donahue Show, which was eventually renamed as simply “Donahue,” was the vehicle through which Phil Donahue first gained popular recognition. For the first time, audience members participated in the program, which ran for 29 years. One of the visitors on his show who radically changed his life’s trajectory was Marlo Thomas.
The book claims that the two met in 1977 in Chicago, when Phil was bringing four children with him. His fifth child, a daughter, lived somewhere else with her mother and ex-wife.
Marlo and Phil dated for three years before being married in 1980 in front of a small wedding party of thirty-five guests.
Not surprise, Marlo’s friends and family were taken aback by the actress’s sudden change of heart. A hilarious story of Marlo’s bridal shower, where visitors hung notes from the soon-to-be bride that disclosed her past views on marriage, is featured in the couple’s book.
The book claims that Marlo’s mother was the most shocked of all, asking Donahue, “How did you get her to do this?” throughout the nuptials of the pair.
Reportedly, among other emotions, even total strangers voiced shock at the well-known social activist’s decision to get married. While Phil was in the lavatory, a passenger on the airplane the couple took to Greece for their honeymoon expressed displeasure to Marlo, presumably disappointed that she had given up her old independent streak.
In the book, Thomas is honest enough to acknowledge that something was unclear when they spoke. After all her life condemning marriage, was she suddenly a hypocrite for getting married? Had she let those down who held her in high regard as the embodiment of self-reliance?
Even though Donahue and Thomas discuss the usual ups and downs of their long marriage in the book, they manage to make their marriage work to this day. They describe these problems as teaching moments that deepened their relationship.
The couple had been apart from the beginning of their marriage, with Phil traveling to Chicago to tape his show and Marlo traveling to pursue her acting career.
Thomas had a greater understanding of how different individuals define marriage when his aunt said that the couple’s union was void because they weren’t living together exclusively. In spite of their separation, Thomas and Donahue were able to keep their marriage together. Significantly, Marlo’s marriage resulted in her having children.
In a 2012 interview with AARP, Thomas reflected on her experience helping Phil raise his kids, stating she went into it knowing that they already had a traditional mother and that would not be her role.
Rather, Marlo claims that she began to treat Phil’s children more like friends in an effort to mimic the parenting style of her own mother. She continues by saying that she feels more connected to them today than she did at the start of their marriage.
Donahue points out that Thomas really did strive to understand the lads in the book and spent as much time as she could getting to know his sons.
Phil and Marlo believe that their long marriage is a result of her strong bond with his kids and their mutual faith in each other. “You build trust when you realize that this person always has your back,” says Marlo in clarification.
Despite being married for more than 40 years, they still have more memories to make.
Phil goes on to argue that a marriage has to be desired by both parties in order for it to last. Marlo says she would never want to be anything other than married to her lover, echoing his sentiments. She claims that Donahue has assisted her “in every manner possible.”
When two people truly commit to one another, marriage is an incredibly lovely union that is made much more beautiful.
These two have a lot to teach and inspire us all. As satisfying as their relationship is, we should all strive to be in one!
My Entitled Daughter Stole My Wedding, but I Didn’t Let It Slide
On the day of Mabel and Adam’s wedding, they’re stuck in a limousine as they crawl along the freeway, thanks to traffic. Instead of keeping her mother’s guests entertained, Mabel’s daughter, Amanda, takes over the wedding, stealing the limelight. Will Mabel retaliate at the wedding or just let Amanda learn her lesson another way?
Weddings are supposed to be magical, right? An entire day dedicated to the culmination of love, months of planning, and a chance to stand with your person, promising to be with them forever…
That was the dream, at least, until my daughter Amanda turned it into an absolute nightmare.
A beautiful wedding setting | Source: Midjourney
Sigh.
It started with traffic, of course. My fiancé Adam and I were stuck on the freeway in our limousine, trapped in a sea of brake lights thanks to an overturned truck miles ahead. We weren’t too worried about the traditions. We were both married before, so seeing each other before the ceremony was the least of our concerns.
“Time, please, Ben?” I called through the intercom for our driver.
A couple sitting in a limousine | Source: Midjourney
“It’s difficult to say, Mabel,” he said. “But I’m trying to gap in whenever I can! I will get you and Adam down the aisle!”
We were definitely going to be late.
“Love, call Amanda,” Adam said, his jaw tight as he tapped on the seat. “Tell her to sort out the guests, just get the band going and keep people entertained.”
A man holding his head | Source: Midjourney
I dialed my daughter, already feeling the pressure. She picked up on the second ring.
“Hey, sweetie,” I said the moment she answered. “We’re stuck in traffic. There has been an accident, so everything is at a standstill. Can you make sure everything’s running smoothly at the venue? We’ll be about 30 minutes or so. Adam said to get the band playing.”
“Of course, Mommy!” Amanda chirped, her voice syrupy sweet. “Don’t you worry about a thing other than getting here. I’ve got everything else handled. Be safe!”
A smiling woman talking on the phone | Source: Midjourney
I exhaled, letting her assurance calm my nerves. But not ten minutes later, my phone buzzed. It was my sister, Jess.
Her voice was frantic.
“Sis, you have to come here now! It’s Amanda, she…” her voice trailed off before the call cut off.
“She’s what?” I muttered, immediately redialing, but it went straight to voicemail. A heavy pit settled in my stomach, but there was nothing we could do except crawl forward in the traffic.
A woman using a phone | Source: Midjourney
“What do you think Jess meant? What do you think is going on?” I asked Adam after filling him in.
“Oh, honey,” he said. “Honestly, I’m sure Amanda picked up a mic and is trying to sing with the band.”
When we finally pulled up to the venue half an hour later, nothing could have prepared me for what I saw. Amanda stood on the steps, her face glowing as she held a bouquet of ivory roses. She was in a wedding dress. It was white and simple, but it was definitely a wedding dress.
A smiling young couple | Source: Midjourney
Our photographers swarmed around her, cameras clicking as she posed with a dazzling smile. And next to her stood Kyle, her boyfriend of barely a year, looking dazed and uncomfortable in a suit.
I felt my heart stop.
“What the hell is going on?” I yelled, storming up the stairs.
Amanda turned to me, her expression a mix of surprise and amusement.
An upset bride | Source: Midjourney
“Oh, Mommy!” she gushed. “I’m so sad you missed the ceremony! It was lovely!”
My jaw dropped.
“My ceremony? You had my ceremony? You stole my ceremony? Amanda, are you out of your damn mind?”
“Well,” she said, brushing imaginary dust off her dress. “I thought since you were late, we couldn’t let the time go to waste. Everything was already set up, and the officiant needed to get going. You know how much I hate delays. So… I married Kyle!”
A smiling bride | Source: Midjourney
The audacity of it left me speechless. My beautiful ceremony, the one Adam and I had dreamed of and planned for months… it was all gone. It had been hijacked by my own daughter.
“You’ll get married another day!” she chirped, as if she hadn’t just crushed my heart. “Now, Kyle and I are going to do the final walk down to the reception hall. The guests are going to throw the rice and confetti. Do you want to join?”
I shook my head.
Confetti being thrown on a couple | Source: Midjourney
Adam came up behind me, his face a mix of fury and heartbreak. He had spent so much time trying to bond and build a relationship with Amanda that I knew her behavior had broken his heart, too.
“Say the word, love,” he said. “Say the word, Mabel, and I’ll shut this down right now.”
I looked at Amanda, the girl I raised, who was now staring at me with infuriating smugness. My fists clenched. Every nerve in my body screamed at me to fight her, to take back what she had stolen.
A frowning man | Source: Midjourney
But I exhaled slowly.
“She’s still my daughter,” I muttered to Adam. “Don’t. I’ll teach her a lesson another way.”
The reception was a surreal experience. Amanda flounced through the room, acting like the star of a fairy tale, completely oblivious to the devastation she’d caused.
My family and friends came around between courses, asking what had really happened.
A crowd of people at a wedding reception | Source: Midjourney
“Mabel, we thought it was your wedding, dear,” my aunt said. “You were supposed to get your happy ending. What is this about Amanda getting married? We didn’t know that she was even seeing someone!”
“I don’t know, Aunt Joy,” I said. “I’m just as surprised as you are.”
When dessert rolled around, Amanda even had the nerve to cut into the cake we’d ordered, complete with the beautiful sugar flowers.
A beautiful wedding cake | Source: Midjourney
Jess pulled me aside at one point, her eyes blazing.
“That daughter of yours pulled my phone away while I was talking to you. And then she locked me in the bathroom during the ceremony! I couldn’t do anything else about it! Why didn’t you stop her when you got here?”
“Because,” I said, a smile curling my lips. “Revenge is best served cold.”
An upset woman | Source: Midjourney
The real kicker came later that evening. Amanda knocked on our hotel room door, smiling as if nothing had happened.
Adam and I were sitting on the bed, eating our way through the room service dessert menu.
“So,” she said, leaning against the cupboard in the room. “Kyle and I need your tickets to Chile for the honeymoon. I mean, there’s no point in you guys using them after all.”
A couple sitting in a hotel room | Source: Midjourney
Adam froze. I swear, I saw his hand twitch toward the night light like he was ready to throw it.
But I smiled, keeping my voice calm.
“Of course, sweetie. You can have the tickets. You and Kyle deserve some fun.”
A smiling bride in a hotel room | Source: Midjourney
Amanda squealed, hugged me, stole a strawberry from one of the plates, and let herself out.
“What the hell, Mabel?” Adam asked. “Really? She’s taking our honeymoon too? We worked so hard for all of this. Our wedding, our honeymoon, all of it. And for what? For Amanda to behave like a brat?”
“I know you’re upset,” I said. “But honey, trust me. She’s going to learn a lesson. Two days from now, you’ll see.”
An upset man in a hotel room | Source: Midjourney
And just like clockwork, Amanda phoned two mornings later, her voice anything but cheerful.
“How could you do this to me, Mom?!” she screamed.
I smirked, cradling the phone to my ear.
“Amanda, darling, is something wrong?”
A woman talking on the phone | Source: Midjourney
“Wrong?” she shouted. “You gave me tickets to the Arctic! We’re stuck in the middle of nowhere, freezing, and there’s nothing to do!”
I bit back a laugh. The tickets had been for Chile, technically. But they were only a layover on the way to our real destination: an Arctic expedition. Glacier hikes, frigid waters, and polar bear sightings.
It was our dream trip. But Amanda? She hated the cold. Luxury resorts and tropical beaches were more her style.
A woman talking on the phone | Source: Midjourney
Classic Amanda. She had never bothered to check the full itinerary.
“You asked for the tickets, Amanda,” I said.
“But what must I do?” she whined.
“You’re a married woman now. Figure it out.”
An upset woman | Source: Midjourney
She hung up on me, already muttering a series of curses. And I couldn’t stop grinning.
Meanwhile, Adam and I made new plans. My sister and our closest friends rallied together to throw us the most beautiful wedding celebration at Jess’s house a week later.
They handled everything, from catering to decorations, and it was even more perfect than I could have imagined.
Beautiful wedding decor | Source: Midjourney
This time, Amanda wasn’t invited. And do you know what made everything so special? The gifts.
Since Amanda had hijacked my original wedding, all the presents went to us. A brand-new espresso machine, luxury linens, and an all-expenses-paid spa weekend from Adam’s older brother.
It was like karma had gift-wrapped itself for us.
A coffee machine in a kitchen | Source: Midjourney
When Amanda found out, she had another meltdown.
“Mom, you stole my wedding gifts?” she shouted over the phone. “Everything was supposed to be left at the wedding venue until we got back from our honeymoon.”
“I think you should stop talking,” I said.
A woman talking on the phone | Source: Midjourney
“Mom, you ruined everything for me!” she cried. “I can’t believe you stole my damn gifts.”
“Amanda,” I began, laughing. “Your gifts? You stole my wedding. Consider this a fair trade.”
Adam, at the espresso machine, doubled over and laughed.
As for Amanda’s new marriage to Kyle?
A man laughing in a kitchen | Source: Midjourney
From what I hear, it’s already on the rocks. Jess told me later that Kyle looked downright miserable during the wedding ceremony. And I had seen that for myself during the reception. He had avoided Adam and me completely.
“That boy’s in for a rough ride with her,” Jess said when she came over for tea and cake a few days later.
Amanda might have stolen my fairy-tale wedding, but her happily-ever-after was already on thin ice.
Cake and tea on a table | Source: Midjourney
As for Adam and me? We’re better than ever. We did go on our Arctic honeymoon, and it was breathtaking.
Some lessons, I guess, are best learned the hard way. Amanda might never admit it, but I like to think she’s realized that entitlement comes at a cost.
And if not? Well, let’s just say I’ll always have the satisfaction of knowing she outsmarted herself.
Karma, after all, has a way of evening the score.
A smiling couple | Source: Midjourney
What would you have done?
If you’ve enjoyed this story, here’s another for you:
My Cousin Intentionally Sewed My Wedding Dress 2 Sizes Smaller – She Was Shocked When She Saw What I Did with It
When Jess and Michael get engaged, her cousin Sarah decided to sew her wedding dress for her as a gift. But during the final fitting, Jess discovers that the wedding dress is two sizes too small. Will Sarah fix her error, or will Jess have to take things into her own hands?
My cousin Sarah and I have always had a complicated relationship. She’s loud and bubbly, but also the type of person who craves the spotlight. And because of that, our entire family gave her the attention she wanted. It made more sense to shine the spotlight on Sarah, rather than ourselves.
When Michael and I got engaged after being together for four years, my whole family seemed genuinely excited for me.
A couple standing together | Source: Midjourney
Sarah even got all of our girl cousins together, along with my best friends, for a night out. Ending in an Airbnb where we continued the party, because I was the first of us to get engaged.
During that night out, Sarah came up to me, a glass of champagne in her hand.
“Jess! I have a great idea!” she said.
A smiling woman holding a glass of champagne | Source: Midjourney
“What?” I asked. “What do you want to do?”
This work is inspired by real events and people, but it has been fictionalized for creative purposes. Names, characters, and details have been changed to protect privacy and enhance the narrative. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
The author and publisher make no claims to the accuracy of events or the portrayal of characters and are not liable for any misinterpretation. This story is provided “as is,” and any opinions expressed are those of the characters and do not reflect the views of the author or publisher.
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