Joan Henrietta Collins was born on May 23, 1933, in Paddington, London, England. She was the daughter of Elsa Collins, a dance teacher, and Joseph William Collins, a talent agent whose clients would later include Shirley Bassey, The Beatles, and Tom Jones.
Joan attended the Francis Holland School and later the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art (RADA) in London, showcasing her early passion for the performing arts.
Rise to Stardom
Collins made her film debut in the early 1950s with a series of British films, including “Lady Godiva Rides Again” (1951) and “The Woman’s Angle” (1952).
Her striking beauty and talent quickly caught the attention of Hollywood, and she soon found herself cast in major motion pictures. In 1955, she appeared in “The Virgin Queen” alongside Bette Davis, which solidified her status as a rising star.
Hollywood Success
Throughout the 1950s and 1960s, Collins starred in a variety of films, including “The Girl in the Red Velvet Swing” (1955), “Rally ‘Round the Flag, Boys!” (1958), and “The Road to Hong Kong” (1962).
Her versatility as an actress allowed her to take on diverse roles, from comedies to dramas, establishing her as a prominent figure in the film industry.
Television Fame: Dynasty
Joan Collins achieved international fame with her role as Alexis Carrington on the American television series “Dynasty” (1981-1989). Her portrayal of the cunning and glamorous ex-wife of Blake Carrington earned her a Golden Globe Award and cemented her status as a television icon.
Bob returns home drunk one night and slips into bed next to his wife
After a night of overindulgence, Bob found himself in an entirely unexpected situation — standing at the Pearly Gates in front of St. Peter.
But instead of accepting his fate, Bob struck a deal to return to life… as a chicken. What followed was an egg-laying, feathery experience he never saw coming.
Stumbling Into Bed
Bob was known for enjoying his nights out a bit too much, and that evening was no exception. Late at night, he stumbled into bed, quietly sliding in next to his wife, who was sound asleep. Little did he know, the night was about to take an unimaginable turn.
As the first light of dawn broke, Bob didn’t wake up in his own bed. Instead, he found himself standing before the grand Pearly Gates.
“Am I dreaming?” he muttered, confused.
St. Peter, clipboard in hand, greeted him warmly.
“Bob, I’m afraid you passed away in your sleep.”
Bob’s jaw dropped in disbelief.
“This can’t be! I’m not ready to go. There’s so much I haven’t done yet!”
St. Peter, sympathetically, offered a solution.
“Well, there is one way you could return, but only as a chicken.”
Desperate to get back to life, Bob reluctantly agreed. Without a moment to reconsider, he was instantly transported to a nearby farm, now covered in feathers, clucking involuntarily.
Clucking Confusion
Adjusting to life as a hen, Bob was met by a smug rooster.
“Well, well, look who’s new in the coop! How’s it going, hen?”
Bob, still in shock, responded,
“Not bad, but I’ve got this weird pressure inside me. I feel like I’m about to burst!”
The rooster laughed.
“Ah, you’re ovulating. Haven’t you ever laid an egg before?”
Bob, wide-eyed, shook his feathery head.
“Never.”
“Well, it’s easy,” the rooster said. “Just relax and let nature take its course.”
Bob hesitated for a moment, but then, to his surprise — and discomfort — he laid an egg. A rush of strange emotions followed, and for a brief moment, he experienced the inexplicable joy of motherhood. He laid another egg, then another. Just as he was about to lay his third, a sharp smack to the back of his head jolted him awake.
“Bob! Wake up!” his wife yelled. “You’re drunk again and pooping in the bed!”
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