According to a survey, only 14% of couples sleep in separate beds every night. And while many of us might believe in the saying “couples who sleep apart grow apart” there are studies that show the opposite is actually true.
We at Bright Side believe that there are no wrong or right sleep arrangements, because to some, sleeping in different beds can be as pleasing as for others sharing a bed with their partner.
A poor night’s sleep can turn lovers into fighters.
According to research, sharing a bed with a partner that has restless sleep behavior can deprive you of 49 minutes of sleep each night. And, when one partner doesn’t get a proper night’s sleep because of the other, it will most likely result in a conflict between them the next day.
Actually, the study even confirmed that couples who tend to have a poor night’s sleep have more severe and more frequent fights than those who wake up well-rested. People who get a good night’s sleep, on the other hand, are more likely to be in a good mood, have lower stress levels, and be more patient.
Resenting your partner because you can’t get a good night’s sleep can be destructive to the relationship.
Snoring, fidgeting, and bed or blanket hogging are just a few of many reasons why some couples choose to sleep in different beds or even in different bedrooms. Lying awake listening to your partner snoring while you beat yourself up to fall asleep can lead to a build-up of anger, tension, and resentment toward your partner.
According to Jennifer Adams, author of Sleeping Apart Not Falling Apart, sleeping in a separate bedroom can even help a relationship thrive because both partners are not sleep deprived.
Each partner can tailor their sleeping conditions to their heart’s content.
Tina Cooper, a licensed social worker, sleeps in different bedrooms with her partner because of their opposite sleeping habits. “I’m a night owl, he’s an early bird. I need soothing sounds to fall asleep, and he likes silence. He likes a hard mattress, and I like soft and full of pillows. And because I don’t like the early day’s sunlight, my boyfriend gave me the master bedroom which gets less light and he has the second largest room that gets the sunrise he loves.”
How you spend the nighttime in your shared bedroom with your partner can also influence your daytime functioning, marital satisfaction, and psychological and physical health. And when 2 people with different bedtime preferences and nighttime schedules end up together, changing themselves just to please their partner’s needs might harm their relationship in the long run.
Sleeping in different bedrooms with your partner means that the 2 of you will have a place just for yourselves where you can relax after an exhausting day. This way, both of you can satisfy your needs without tiptoeing around and worrying about whether your partner might wake up because you want to watch the latest episode of your show before bed.
Even if you don’t remember waking up, disturbed sleep can have a negative impact on your overall health.
During the night, our brain cycles through the stages of sleep several times: light sleep, deep sleep, and REM (Rapid eye movement sleep). But when you interrupt the cycle by waking up during the night, it means that your brain spends more time in the light sleep stage and misses out on REM. And without sufficient REM your emotional well-being and cognitive performance suffer.
Interrupted sleep can also have short and long-term health consequences, like hypertension, weight-related issues, mental health problems, reduced quality of life, and other health-related issues.
People on Reddit share why they decided to sleep separately with their partner.
- “Because a good night’s sleep is more romantic than sharing a bed. I snore and toss and turn. He gives off literal village levels of heat in his sleep and I can’t stand the heat. I read, he can’t stand light. We keep different hours to an extent. A million reasons. We get along so much better this way.” — crankyweasels
- “My partner and I have completely separate bedrooms. We ’sleepover’ occasionally in each other’s rooms. However, we both sleep exponentially better apart. He’s a night owl and I’m an early bird. He wants only one sheet on him, I want 10 lbs of blankets. In addition, having a separate room allows me to decorate it however I want, have my own personal space, and keep it to the level of cleanliness I prefer. People look at us sideways when I mention the separate rooms thing, but it’s been a game-changer.” — eriasana
- “Different sleep cycles due to different work schedules. We are still madly in love and we both agreed to this because it’s the best for both of us.” — AFishInATank
- “Early in our relationship, 90% of our fights occurred in the bedroom. I like to sleep in a cold room with the fan on and white noise like a box fan. I also like to go to sleep with the TV on. She likes to sleep in a warm, still, cave in complete silence and darkness. We started sleeping in separate rooms and all of a sudden 90% of our fights stopped. Also, because we were getting real sleep, other fights turned more into heated discussions.” — ttc8420
What are your sleeping arrangements with your partner? Do you believe sleeping in different beds can help a relationship thrive?
You Won’t Believe What This Millionaire Did to Solve Homelessness in His Town!
Homelessness is a problem that many cities face around the world. Even though governments and organizations are trying to fix it, it’s still a big issue. One Canadian millionaire decided to make a difference in his own town with his money. Here’s his story.
In Fredericton, New Brunswick, Marcel LeBrun, a millionaire entrepreneur, took action to help homeless people in his community. Marcel, who made a lot of money from his successful social media monitoring company, decided to invest $4 million of his own money to build 99 tiny homes for those in need. He didn’t just stop at providing homes; he also created job opportunities with his unique approach. This project is called 12 Neighbours.
After selling his company and gaining a lot of wealth, Marcel wanted to use his money for good. Seeing the homelessness issue in Fredericton, he came up with the idea of a tiny home community to give homeless people a new start. He named his project 12 Neighbours and aimed to build a gated community with 99 homes and an enterprise center. This community offers both housing and job opportunities, giving homeless people a chance to rebuild their lives.
Homelessness is a big issue in New Brunswick, with about 1,600 people experiencing it in a single day last year. In bigger cities like San Francisco, Los Angeles, and New York in the United States, the number of homeless people is much higher. Marcel LeBrun saw a chance to make a difference and decided to help those struggling with homelessness.
Marcel’s project, 12 Neighbours, is not just about building tiny homes. He wants to create a supportive community for people. The tiny homes he’s building are more than just places to stay. They are fully-furnished with kitchens, living areas, bedrooms, and full bathrooms. They even have solar panels on the roofs. Marcel sees himself as a community builder, aiming to provide a better life for those in need.
To make his vision a reality, Marcel LeBrun set up a factory where skilled volunteers help build the tiny homes. Using modern techniques, the factory can produce one tiny home every four business days. Once a home is built, it is carefully placed on concrete blocks to form the foundation of the community.
Marcel believes that owning a home is important because it gives people a sense of responsibility and stability. By allowing people who have experienced homelessness to own their own homes, the 12 Neighbours project aims to empower them and create a supportive community.
Besides providing homes, Marcel LeBrun’s project also focuses on creating job opportunities for the residents. The 12 Neighbours community includes an enterprise center with a coffee bar and a silk printing business, both run by the residents. This helps generate income and encourages residents to interact with the wider community.
Like any big project, 12 Neighbours has faced criticism. Some people think it’s better to reintegrate homeless individuals directly into society rather than keeping them together in one place. However, Marcel understands these concerns and has taken steps to ensure the community is safe and supportive.
Marcel explained, “Building a few homes is just as complicated as building many, and we wanted to make a real impact on homelessness in Fredericton. If we want to make a meaningful difference, we need to build houses. If I take someone who’s been living outside and put them in a luxury apartment, they might not succeed because it’s not their community or environment.”
Marcel LeBrun knows how important safety is, so he has included top security features in the 12 Neighbours community. There are gated entrances and advanced surveillance systems to ensure residents feel safe and protected.
LeBrun mentioned that some residents face challenges when they first move in. He explained, “When someone moves into a house, they might have others trying to take advantage of them. They need to learn what it means to manage their own space and decide who they let in and out.”
One of the main goals of 12 Neighbours is to build a strong sense of community both inside and outside its gates. LeBrun wants to create a place where residents and the people of Fredericton can come together. The community has a coffee bar and a personalized printing business to encourage interaction and understanding.
LeBrun told CBC, “I see myself as a community builder. We’re not just building a small community; we’re helping to make our city better.”
Marcel LeBrun’s project to build 99 tiny homes in Fredericton, New Brunswick, is a great example of using personal success to help others. Through 12 Neighbours, he has not only provided homes for those in need but also created job opportunities and a supportive community. His efforts have given hope to many and inspired others to make a difference.
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